I cockslap morals
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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