We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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