i think my tv is drunk
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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