Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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