Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
