I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
