Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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