There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
