I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
