I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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