My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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