The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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