how can u be prego again
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
