This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize