some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Dick very happy bro
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
