please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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