The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
