Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
