Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
