I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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