i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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