You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
