Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
did you just send me my own nude
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
