Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
