Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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