My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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