found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
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his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
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We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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