I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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