I think scott just propositioned me for sex
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize