I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
