what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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