..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
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If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
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Do I have a choice?
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I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
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It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
The adults are the big ones right?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize