I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
