spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
