can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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