My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
