You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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