I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
