Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
is that a dick in a sweater?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
