I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
