Dual....:-)
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
