The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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