omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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