I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
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His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
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She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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