I wanna bring you to show and tell
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
