Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
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