Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
