dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
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We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
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And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize