I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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