Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
