The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
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They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
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