Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Randomize